


Expired

by renegadeRoyalty



Category: Inazuma Eleven
Genre: Character Study, Jealousy, M/M, POV Second Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-28
Updated: 2012-02-28
Packaged: 2017-10-31 20:58:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/348310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renegadeRoyalty/pseuds/renegadeRoyalty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even if you lie to yourself, he knows you for what you are. And maybe he could realize that sometimes you do tell the truth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Expired

**Author's Note:**

> ehehehe it's pretty late but pixiv and music are keeping me up and i have a few minutes to kill so why not OTP drabble?  
> also, the last time i watched InaEleGO was in august, so i'm horribly behind here, thus headcanons and mentions and stuff might be outdated.

It sometimes pains you. You're like the devil, a perfect contrast to his facade of a perfect angel. And he's faking it, you're faking it. Shindou isn't that golden at all, he can be mean, he can be mean to Tenma, to Kirino, to Sangoku, to you. And when he's the worst to you, you become the best to him, being as nice to your lover almost as nice you are to your older brother. And sometimes, you're just pretending to care when he tells you you're an asshole and that he's wasting his time being your punching bag. But at certain times the words actually hurt you, making you feel uncomfortable at first then sending shivers down to your marrow which lead to you having violent outbreaks, yelling at him, kicking everything in sight, but not him, never him. You have your boundaries, and his flesh is your main one. You know you would never go that far, but lately the line between „acceptable“ and „abuse“ is becoming blurred and, while seeing spots formed out of pure rage, you wish to punch his face in, tug his brown, curly hair until it hurts him and just finish this sick game.  
Now, as you sit on a bench in one of the many gardens your new school has, you wonder why exactly do you keep up with this, and more importantly, why is he doing this at all. You and Shindou have been secretly dating for about a month and a half and so far it's been nothing but fights and arguments. You often rely on your pure strength and height to intimidate him, but he knows better, he's seen your soul and unfortunately, he knows exactly what words to say to make you stop, freeze in that spot and start feeling all alone. He continues, and you can't help it, you know you'll either cry or break something in half so you choose the latter, grabbing the first thing your fingers touch and turning it into nothing but waste. You've done this so many times, it pains you.  
You know he's there, but you pretend you don't acknowledge his existance until he speaks up, even then you only lazily look at him, your eyelids half closed, your signature smirk visible on your face and you know you're in for another fight but you can't help yourself. „Kyousuke, are you even listening to me?“ and the words you say can't be stopped „Yeah, you're going to leave me. So?“ you deadpan, feigning ignorance and carelessness but deep inside, you can't even imagine yourself without Takuto, as stupid as that may sound. „If you're alright with it, I guess it's over.“ He looks rebellious for a moment but then his gaze moves from your eyes to the floor and he looks so weak, so vunerable you can't forgive him for even thinking he could do anything without you. Fingers curling into fists, you get up wildly and practically run over to him „It's over when I say it's over, rich boy!“ The fear is again present in his eyes, like it was the first time you defeated him in a game, the first time you threatened him, the first time you kissed him. But this time, you've managed to anger him too, he raises his voice „I am not your puppet, Tsurugi!“ And you grimace, not liking what you hear, and at that moment the little anger that was his resistance vanishes and before you stands a boy who's afraid of your next move, and you approach him, with every step you take, he takes one back, until his back hit a post. The lines blur again and you find yourself wishing to injure your boyfriend, hurt him into realizing that he does, in fact, belong to you. „You're mine, you get that?!“ You yell at him, so close you feel him almost trembling but he manages to look you in the eyes and ask „Why? What are we even doing?“ And you don't know. The spots you see are becoming bigger and you slam a fist into the pillar, right next to Takuto's head, his eyes widen and you can almost see tears. It's been a while since you made him cry so you grab his collar, getting in his face „As long as I want you, you belong to me, don't even think about leaving, you're never free from me, understand?!“ his voice is trembling when he speaks up, but his words are still opposing yours. „I do not belong to you. All you want to achieve here is to break me, you never even knew what I felt for you...“he smiles bitterly, tears in his eyes almost falling out, almost leaving streaks on his cheeks „This ends today, I refuse to be nothing more than a punching bag for your frustratio-„ The spots are now blinking, your ears are ringing so you punch him.

You punch your boyfriend right in the face. Blood emerges from his lower lip as he turns his head back to look at you, and as soon as you see his face, you kiss him. It tastes of blood and fear, it's the taste of your love. You feel his tears on your cheeks as you deepen the kiss, his arms wrapping around your neck, your arms around his thin waist. When he breaks the kiss for air, you kiss him again. You kiss him for all the times you made him cry, for all the times he made you feel like shit and you know he knows the meaning as your arms pull his body closer to your own and you press him against the post. He moans into the kiss and his hands are holding tight, too tight, it hurts but you ignore it for the sake of the kiss. You finally finish it, opening your eyes to look at him. Lips swollen but not bleeding anymore, a trace of smile visible, eyes still closed as you kiss his forehead. He looks up at you, and you don't really don't know what to say. Luckily, he speaks up first. „Kyousuke, I've thought about this for a while now. I love you.For my sake, this has to end.“ It's obvious to you that your expression makes you look abandoned but you don't care. Takuto already knows how pathetic you actually are. All the more reasons why you can't live without him. Your hands press his body into your and you whisper that plea, your last chance of saving your relationship but the only thing you hear is that bitter laugh. „Either I leave now, or I go insane.“ Finally, it's clear to you. His feelings for you are a duplicate of your feelings for him and you back off so you can look him in the eyes. „Shindou, I love you.“ It still sounds more like a plea rather than as a confession but it's evident how much you need him. He opens his mouth to speak but you interrupt him before he even gets the chance to „Listen, I love you. I know I lied to you but I mean this. So don't leave me.“ After that you leave, not giving him another opportunity to object your statement.

Later that night, you get a text message. It's from Shindou, and your heartbeat rate increases.  
„I love you too. I guess we could try again. –Takuto“  
You promise to yourself that you'll treat him better but deep down, you know that the first time he talks to Kirino or the first time he says something bad to you, you'll see spots and you'll yell, kick objects, pretending not to care. It will all be followed by a make out session and faux promises that things will be alright. They won't be alright but they begun that way. Your relationship is complicated, but you love him too much to let go and you know he feels the same. You close the message without replying, and you go to bed. The sick game you, Tsurugi Kyousuke, play with your lover, Shindou Takuto, continues. Deep down, that pains you.


End file.
